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CUTTING REMARKS
John D. Kelly IV, MD
What's for Lunch?
The staff lounge can be hazardous to your health.
T
he cafeteria can be a source of solace or penance. Thankfully,
my facility has reasonable fare. Sadly, I have experienced the
full spectrum of dining opportunities at surgical facilities.
1. You're on your own. These miserly facilities offer nothing but a
fridge, a coffee machine and maybe a microwave with 2 wobbly
tables. The CEO of these facilities is all business and any overhead is
met with contempt. There is a surcharge on salt and even the
Styrofoam coffee cups are recycled. The staff is compelled to bring
their lunches, order takeout or simply starve. Thank God for nutrition
bars!
2. The chamber of horrors. These facilities boast a cafeteria, but the
more proper term would be "the Pit and the Pendulum." At one facility, the food was so bad, I prayed after I ate. One day after placing my
order I received a UFO — an unidentified frying object. Even the
roaches went on strike. Typical fare includes an E. coli burger. These
purveyors of poisonous fare complement very well a surgicenter with
a busy GI service.
3. Healthy choice. We know all too well the healthy, but truly tasteless, menus that are becoming more commonplace. Everything
from sprouts to miso garnishes the menu. Whole wheat peanut butter and fertilized dodo eggs don't do much for my palate. Sadly,
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O U T PAT I E N T S U R G E R Y M A G A Z I N E O N L I N E | F E B R U A R Y 2013
